An attorney I know casually (he’s in California practicing estate planning for dysfunctional families) said it better than I ever could: “I am a problem solver, not a problem creator. You are hiring me to solve your problems, not create problems for the other person. Of course, I probably can’t solve your problem without making a bit of a problem for the other guy. I understand that. But, the GOAL always must be to solve your problem. If the only purpose in doing something is to cause the other person pain, I won’t do it. If you’re okay with that, we can work together.”
Please keep that in mind. Then when you want me to hammer the other side about something not essential to the case be prepared to answer the key question: “How much of our litigation budget should I devote to that?”
Why do I ask that question? Because scorched-earth litigation is very expensive. More expensive than regular litigation, which is expensive enough for most of my clients.